Rom Com-plex Season

    I spent the entire week watching rom-coms to increase my understanding of complex relationships (not really) and the ones that stuck out the most were the relationships in many classics, such as The Proposal, How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days, and Moonstruck. I couldn't deny how complex yet similar each relationship was to the next and their impact on our hearts. This standard is not only kept in films, but also spreads through literature, theatre, and most importantly our lives. When we see a character on screen we share their aches and joys as if they were our own, and in a way they are. It's not the unrealistic or comedic elements of a great piece that call out to us but the relationships in it that we so deeply crave. 

    

    When reading the book The Vanishing Half, I came across many relationships including between a mother and daughter, a husband and wife, and a pair of potential lovers. The relationship between Adele and her daughter Desiree depicted a very familiar dynamic, one most usually shown in a family with siblings. Desiree has a twin named Stella, who is known as quiet, mature, and passive, whereas Desiree is seen as independent, reckless, and stubborn. As seen through her actions, Desiree is often in continuous disagreement with her mother. Let's call this every teenager ever stage, however, we see this throughout the book even when they have both grown up to be adults. Desiree doesn't want to stay in Mallard, but Adele disagrees. Adele feels that a man with dark skin means a life of struggle and unhappiness, but Desiree counters. Desiree wants to keep looking for her lost sister, but Adele refuses. It's a continuous cycle and with each new argument, we see a crack in the relationship. However, this doesn't mean that either of them are bad people, if anything it makes them even more human. Within Adele's arguments, we see the love she has for her daughter and the life she wants for her daughter, the very one she lost. She comforts her daughter through her actions, putting away the pride of being right. While every decision and word spoken by Adele isn't right, it always falls in line with her heart. Similarly, Desiree never stops respecting her mother. She empathizes with her position and the things she's done so far. Adele isn't a bad mother, nor a Desiree a bad daughter. That's what makes a relationship so captivating. Their problems and lack of experience with life bring out the deepest parts of us and allow us to connect.